As I begin to write this, I am glad Facebook does not have a “Hate”
button.
For me, Teej is a meaningless traditional ritual that
enslaves women and chains them to a myth of them being docile, meek and
sacrificial tokens. This doesn’t portray a good wife but it's a personification
of a FOOLISH woman who blindly and unquestioningly does what an oppressive
culture dictates. The greatest irony is that young and educated women increasingly
celebrate this mockery of women in the name of celebrating womanhood.
Teej is nothing but a dyspotian mindset that smacks of misogyny,
patriarchy and oppression – I know I am ruffling quite a bit of feathers here!
But, never mind! I dare say that Teej is just a ritual best wrapped up in pseudo
love, and worst a cruel instrument of social control on women’s agency. Worse
yet, nowadays a cultural legitimacy is slathered to make it look like a “family
celebration”. Why on earth would you choose Teej, a signpost of female subordination,
to make a family celebration?
Then there is another cohort which tries to bring in the “parity”
aspect to refute congenital lop-sidedness. A man suddenly becomes a fasting company
to his wife. I believe this act is just a sign of sympathy to women folks and a
well-thought-out patriarchal tool to cover a murky inequality perpetuated by
Teej. A co-fasting man is no one but our society’s metrosexual man who is then raised
to a magnanimous character who cares for his wife. Some metrosexual men have
gone extra-miles in wishing women Teej in their modern offices. I tell you that
by doing so, the patriarchal dice still turns in their favour. So, why would
not they happily promote Teej at workplace?
The women are happy. The men are happy. So, you might say, “what’s
your problem?”. Well, my problem is that through generations, men and women
have continued to promote and protect patriarchal values, inequality and
injustice through a bullshit (oops!) culture like this one. Any culture that
connotes discrimination and inequality is nothing less than an “explicit
violence”.
So, when someone flaunts patriarchal symbols including chhadke tilahari, sindoor and dar in the name of Teej, please do not feel under pressure to press the like button every time.
As I finish writing this, how I wish Facebook did carry the "Hate" button!
